


Waffles

by AnneAnimus



Category: Batwoman (TV 2019)
Genre: Cunnilingus, Explicit Sexual Content, F/F, First Time, Incest, Kanecest, Kissing, Lesbian Sex, Oral Sex, Romance, Sibling Incest, Twincest, Vaginal Fingering
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-08
Updated: 2020-05-12
Packaged: 2021-03-03 01:42:01
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 6,884
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24066793
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AnneAnimus/pseuds/AnneAnimus
Summary: Kate meets with Alice again, not sure what to expect. She never could have predicted the way the night would end.
Relationships: Beth Kane | Alice/Kate Kane
Comments: 7
Kudos: 63





	1. Chapter 1

Kate got home after ten, a deep ache in her muscles after taking out an adept mugger. Vigilantism was exhausting. As she kicked the door closed, she spotted a red and white cardboard food container holding a waffle stacked high with toppings. Wary, she looked around her apartment, not finding her sister anywhere. She must have been there at the park. Waiting. Getting back on her motorcycle, she drove there as quickly as she could. Before she even parked the bike, she saw Alice on the swing just like last time. The sound of gravel crunching under Kate’s feet was only blocked out by her deep gulp as she approached the blonde. Alice continued swinging gently until Kate stopped in front of her. She dragged her feet in the mulch, coming to a stop.

“What happened to your hand?” Kate asked 

It was visibly swollen and haphazardly wrapped in gauze.

“Something upset me,” she replied, shrugging and picking at the bandage.

“How long have you been waiting here?” Kate asked, hands in her jacket pockets.

“A while.” Alice said, getting up to walk closer to Kate. “We didn’t really get to talk last time what with me being dragged to Arkham and all.”

“I had nothing to do with that,” Kate reminded her.

“I know. You protected me. You saved my life. More than once,” Alice replied, holding her palm gently against Kate’s cheek. “Why?”

“What do you mean, why?” Kate asked, heartbroken.

“Our dad was ready to make Swiss cheese out of me. I thought you two were on the same side,” Alice said, dropping her hand beside her and looking to the ground.

“I’m always on your side, Beth. I just don’t want you to kill people. That doesn’t mean I want you dead,” Kate replied.

Alice closed her eyes, gathering the strength to walk away from Kate. When she turned around, Kate held her by the shoulder. Too aggressively, Alice shook out of her hold, storming down the sidewalk.

“Hey! What did I say?” Kate asked, chasing after her. 

Alice stopped and turned abruptly, causing Kate to stumble a little to come to a stop in front of her. She felt short as Alice stood tall on high heels.

“Don’t call me Beth again. Ever,” Alice said, poking her finger into Kate’s chest twice. “I can be better, Kate, but that doesn’t mean you’re gonna get her back. All that shit that made me like this still happened no matter how much we talk about how we used to play hide-and-seek or Christmases with Mom. Mourn Beth if that’s what you need to do because you can’t put that expectation on me anymore.”

“I never meant-”

“Save it, Kate. You should just go. I don’t even know why I called you here. I guess I just wanted to see you again. Not surrounded by crows or rabbits or cats,” she said, voice trembling.

This wasn’t where she intended the conversation to go. She planned to temper her reaction when Kate inevitably called her Beth. But it hurt that her sister couldn’t accept who she was now and she felt embarrassed that Kate could see the tears on her cheeks with the intensity of the street lights.

“Stay with me,” Kate said.

“Why?” Alice asked, crossing her arms over her chest.

“Because. Fine… You’re not Beth anymore. But I still care about you. You’re still important to me and after everything you’ve been through, I just want to help make things good for you. Help you have some peace,” Kate replied, reaching for Alice’s hand.

She didn’t pull back so Kate held it tightly in hers.

“Let me pull you out of the rabbit hole, Alice,” Kate added, finally getting through to her.

Alice was already crying too much for a verbal response so she shook her head once, letting Kate lead her to her motorcycle. Kate strapped the helmet onto Alice and held her hand so she could straddle the bike. When Kate got on she put up the kickstand and started the bike, Alice leaning into her back and wrapping her arms around Kate’s waist.

Kate wasn’t used to the feeling of affection it caused. It scared her because there was something not quite normal about it. And there was no plan. Soon, they’d be in Kate’s one-bedroom apartment together, not knowing what the next step was supposed to be. All Kate knew was that, now that she had the chance, she wasn’t going to fail her again. She believed Alice. About Beth being gone. It was devastating to have it acknowledged so swiftly by Alice, but she needed to hear it. Needed to be reminded that it was Alice who relied on her now. It wouldn’t right the many wrongs they’d both committed, but it could be enough.

Alice followed Kate into the apartment, already familiar with the layout from her many break-ins. Kate hurried into the kitchen to pour them both a drink, hoping it would help ease the thick tension that was practically choking them. Alice took off her long, pale blue peacoat. Underneath it, she wore a darker blue vest and a ruffled, white button-up with lace frills at the cuffs. It almost distracted from how tight her dark jeans were. Kate chastised herself for noticing that last detail.

“It’s late. You should get some rest,” Kate said. “I’ll get you some pajamas.”

Alice followed her into the bedroom, sipping her drink and sitting at the edge of the bed with her legs crossed as she leaned back on one palm.

“You can have the bed,” Kate added, setting the clothing on the bed next to Alice.

“Don’t be ridiculous. We can share,” Alice said, sitting up to grab Kate’s wrist before she pulled away. “Have a sleepover like we used to. We only had twin beds back then.”

“I had sleepovers with Beth. Either you’re her or you’re not. You can’t have it both ways,” Kate snapped, not sure why it came out that way.

Kate took a defensive stance in front of Alice again, putting some space between them.

“I’m made of her. But that doesn’t mean I’m not a different person,” Alice summarized.

“Then how am I supposed to be around you? I mean, are we friends? Are we enemies?” Kate asked, leaning against the dresser in exasperation.

“Something else,” Alice said, shaking her head and throwing back the rest of her drink.

“What?” Kate asked impatiently.

“I don’t know yet,” she replied, setting the empty glass on the comforter beside her.

“But we sleep in the same bed?” Kate wondered, needing clarification.

“It’s not a big deal,” Alice said, seeing the blush on Kate’s cheeks. “Unless… it is.”

Alice got up and walked toward Kate until she was only a foot away. Kate struggled to keep eye contact with her and shoved her hands in the pockets of her jeans, buckling under the scrutiny.

“What do you mean by that?” Kate asked, heart rate climbing with every passing second.

Alice didn’t blink. She studied Kate. Her body language. Her expression. The slight dilation in her eyes. Still, she wasn’t sure if she could see what she was looking for so she dropped it for now.

“You’ll have to forgive me for being behind on the protocol regarding platonic sleeping arrangements,” she said, picking up the pajamas from the bed and suddenly disappearing into the bathroom.

Kate relaxed, letting out a long, deep breath. She felt ashamed by the intense throbbing in her pants as she swallowed, trying to calm herself. Back in the living room, she sat on the couch finishing her drink in one big gulp and pouring another. Now that she was changed, Alice met her at the couch and Kate was immediately affected by the way she looked wearing her boxers and sleeveless tee. Completely not Alice’s style, but sending her imagination into overdrive without her permission anyway. Alice sat down on the couch next to her, having brought her empty glass from the bedroom. Kate reached out to refill it, trying to ignore how much of Alice’s legs were exposed to her right now.

“I think…” Alice began, drinking half of her drink before continuing. “I think I’d feel better if you slept in the bed with me. I mean, I’m used to sleeping alone, but I like how you make me feel. Comfortable. Warm. Blank,” she said, closing her eyes serenely.

“Fine,” Kate said, vowing to ignore these intense feelings to bring comfort to Alice.

The complication wasn’t fair. Kate didn’t want to feel this on top of everything else. At first, she didn’t recognize it. Not because she couldn’t, but because she wouldn’t. If she gave this feeling a name, she’d have to confront it. She already had enough secrets for one lifetime. Alice just broke something free inside her with the intensity and fearlessness she breathed into every moment. What stirred the deep affection in her the most, though, was how vulnerable she seemed now. Alice had never shown a single hairline crack in her confident facade until she was alone with Kate. She took their empty glasses to the sink and then Alice followed her into the bedroom again. Kate changed into something similar to what she’d given Alice and when she came out of the bathroom, Alice was already under the blankets.

Kate hesitated, feeling awkward about the whole thing. She knew she was the only one perpetuating that feeling because Alice already looked relaxed. Pulling back the sheet, Kate climbed in carefully, lying uncomfortably on her back at least two feet away from Alice. She closed her eyes, hoping that she could just fall asleep and not have to deal with this anymore tonight. Relief wasn’t forthcoming, especially when Alice moved closer to her, draping an arm across her stomach. Kate was rigid under her, squeezing her eyes shut even tighter.

“Thank you for taking care of me, Kate,” Alice whispered, kissing Kate gently on the temple.

“Yeah,” Kate replied, unable to say more because her voice would shake too much.

Eventually, Kate wore herself out enough to fall asleep. It was much easier when Alice’s breathing turned deep and soft beside her. She’d even relaxed into Alice’s embrace at some point before her eyes closed. A few hours later, she was scared awake by Alice shaking and mumbling in her sleep. Kate could see the fear on her face even with the minimal moonlight coming in through the window. She didn’t know what to do because the last thing she wanted was to scare Alice, who would likely be disoriented upon waking. That could be dangerous for both of them. But as Alice’s cries became more desperate, Kate ran out of choices. She stroked her fingers through Alice’s damp hair, trying to soothe her, but she jerked away, eyes wide. Having not readjusted to her surroundings yet, she shuffled backwards on the bed, nearly falling off of it. 

“Alice, you’re okay,” Kate said, grabbing her hand and pulling her away from the edge.

“Get off of me,” she said, pulling her hand back and sobbing into the pillow.

Her body curled in on itself and Kate didn’t know what to do. She wanted to reach out to comfort Alice again, but all it had done so far was freak her out more.

“It was a nightmare. You’re awake now,” she tried, using a calm voice.

Alice’s eyes, still so full of tears, searched Kate’s face, needing to absorb the sense of reassurance she was trying to offer. Her hands came up between them and she placed one on each of Kate’s cheeks, still sniffling as she calmed down. With how shaken up Alice was, Kate was completely caught by surprise when Alice’s soft lips pressed into hers. She pulled back, her hot breath on Kate’s lips briefly before she went back in, kissing her more deeply now. Kate was trying to find the desire to pull out of the kiss, but she knew it wasn’t in her. Finally, she let herself react, pulling Alice closer by her waist and taking over the kiss. It was supposed to feel wrong, but instead she felt like a whole person for the first time since the accident.

There was a sense of urgency behind it for Kate because she didn’t know when Alice would back out of the kiss and she wanted to get as much out of it as she could before that happened. Kate’s hand slipped lower, fingertips teasing at the hem of Alice’s shirt. She heard Alice sniffle again and she pulled back, seeing that she was still crying. Her hand slipped a few inches to hold Kate behind her neck, rejoining their lips. She rolled back slightly, causing Kate to end up half on top of her, one thigh between Alice’s legs. Kate pulled the sheet over them, straightening out on top of Alice, spreading the blonde’s legs open so she could rest between them. Her hand teased under Alice’s shirt, lightly touching around her ribs, nervous to go higher.

Alice effectively removed Kate’s doubts by taking off her own shirt and dropping it off the side of the bed. Kate looked down at her bare chest, then into Alice’s eyes, kissing her while she massaged the newly exposed flesh in one hand. Alice pushed forward into Kate’s hand, loving the way her nipple hardened against her palm. When Alice moaned, it was immediately followed by Kate’s hips grinding down into her firmly with certainty behind it. Alice’s skin felt pliant and warm, pulling her closer to the point where she could no longer stop herself. She was still considering it because she knew it was wrong even though it didn’t feel that way. Part of her felt like she was taking advantage of Alice, too. After her nightmare, she was in an extremely sensitive state and maybe Kate took things too far.

“Stop thinking,” Alice pleaded, returning to the kiss.

“I just… I don’t know how this happened,” Kate started.

“Because we both wanted it to happen,” Alice replied.

“How did you know I wanted this?” Kate asked, terrified that she’d been too obvious.

“I didn’t. Not for sure. Not until I kissed you and you kissed back,” Alice said, running her hands up under the hem of Kate’s shirt.

Kate took the hint and sat back just enough to take it off. Feeling Alice’s bare chest against hers made the whole thing more real somehow and it excited Kate as much as it scared her. She wanted to know how long Alice felt that way, but her body language was demanding that talking cease in favor of more touch. Her fingernails scratched lightly against Kate’s scalp as she finally started down toward Alice’s shorts. The way she was touching Alice wasn’t like the way she touched other women. Kate treated her body like something delicate and beautiful like a fragile statue. To work her way up to being inside of Alice, Kate rubbed her through the shorts, the rhythm of their kiss stuttering when she felt the dampness.

Alice moaned softly, louder ones building behind them as Kate experimented with pressure and movement. She found that Alice was most responsive to a slow but firm up and down stroke. Alice held onto Kate’s hair, pulling her head down toward her neck. Every hot exhale from Kate made Alice sweat more. Not able to wait anymore, Kate pulled back, feeling Alice’s nails scratch lightly across wherever she could reach in the retreat. Taking off her own shorts after Alice’s, she hesitated before getting back into position because she couldn’t take her eyes off of Alice’s completely naked body laid open beneath her. Their pace was still slow in spite of how long they’d let these feelings build before allowing them to burst free. Alice knew what it was to be fucked. This was very different than that. Kate was making love to her and the realization struck her with an even stronger feeling of affection.

“I never knew you could be so soft,” Alice said more to herself.

“Only for you,” Kate replied, fingers moving slowly against Alice’s aching, swollen flesh. “What do you like?”

“I like you exploring,” Alice replied, closing her eyes when Kate teased her opening.

“Don’t close your eyes. I like when you look at me,” Kate said.

Alice opened them, only able to focus until Kate’s fingers pushed into her. She kissed Kate slowly, tilting her hips upward to encourage her. Alice’s arms met behind Kate’s back as she let the repeated penetration bring her closer to Kate. When Kate’s fingers paused inside her, Alice felt afraid, again, that Kate wanted to stop. Alice had spent the past fifteen years protecting herself, but Kate made her want to let go. She struggled to trust it, even with Kate’s reassurances. They hadn’t yet reached the moment that really changed things. The moment that reveals if the feelings were there or it was just something that happened.

“Please don’t change your mind,” Alice whispered, releasing her fear in tight space between them.

“I’m not. I just… I’m a little overwhelmed,” Kate said, shaking her head free of the distractions and beginning the push and pull between Alice’s legs again.

“Well then that makes us a matching pair,” Alice replied, moaning each time Kate was all the way inside her.

Despite the fear and serious conversation, Kate felt the first flutters of Alice’s walls against her searching fingers. Alice fought to keep her eyes open, wanting Kate to enjoy the unadulterated pleasure in them. To remind her that she was the one causing it. Alice’s hand suddenly wrapped around Kate’s wrist, holding it in place while she used her hips to push against the now stationary fingers. Alice didn’t bother holding back any of the moans. Kate kissed Alice, barely quieting her and when she dipped her tongue into Alice’s mouth, she felt the tight embrace around her fingers. Alice gifted Kate a desperate whimper as the pressure intensified. Kate’s lower belly tightened in response to Alice’s wet heat running down her fingers and she wasn’t even slightly surprised that she was on the verge of coming herself.

“Don’t move,” Alice said, tightening her grip on Kate.

“What’s wrong?” Kate asked, trying to read Alice’s expression.

“I just… That meant something to you, right?” she asked.

She was still trapped in the fear that Kate thought she’d effectively quelled.

“Alice, it meant everything,” she said, causing Alice to finally release her. 

Kate rested on her side, pulling Alice against her, carefully placing a thigh between her legs.

“I’m just scared I’ll wake up tomorrow and it’ll be different.”

“It’s already different. Better. I know it’s probably going to take time, but I’m going to prove it to you. That I care about you. That I love you. Someday, you won’t be scared anymore,” Kate replied, running her hand soothingly up and down Alice’s side.


	2. Chapter 2

Kate walked happily back to her apartment the next morning, coffee and breakfast in hand. When she got inside, she noticed that Alice was still asleep so she set the drink carrier and paper bag on the kitchen table, going into the bedroom quietly. The blanket lay just above Alice’s bellybutton. Her arms rested over her head, which was tilted toward the bedside table. Kate’s eyes were drawn to the deep rise and fall of her chest, her breasts fully on display. She sat gently on the edge of the bed, bringing her hand to rest gently on top of the sheet over Alice’s stomach. At the simple touch, Alice’s eyes moved under the still-closed lids. She took a deep breath, opening them at last. When she saw Kate appreciating the sight of her naked chest, she smiled, bringing her hand to Kate’s thigh.

“You’re dressed already,” she said, voice rough.

“I got breakfast. But let me redo this, first,” Kate replied, picking up Alice’s bandaged hand.

Alice, very much not used to being taken care of, swallowed hard. She was determined not to cry (especially not having been awake a whole minute yet) over what most people would think was a pretty mundane interaction. Her instinct was to ignore it. To tell Kate it was no big deal. That was how she felt. But Kate wanted to help and Alice was dying to let her. Alice nodded. Kate got up, rooting through the drawers in her bathroom for supplies, and meeting Alice back at the bed. The blonde sat up, leaning against the headboard and never taking her eyes off of Kate. She observed as Kate gently picked up her hand, unwrapping the stretched out and frayed gauze. When Kate saw the raw, skinned knuckles, she sucked in a breath through her teeth, knowing it had to hurt.

“So, who was on the receiving end of this?” Kate asked, setting Alice’s hand on her lap while she opened an alcohol wipe, cleaning the broken skin. 

“Cinder block,” Alice answered, still watching intently.

Kate, knowing how much that alcohol had to sting, watched Alice’s face for signs of pain or discomfort. But there was nothing. Did she have a high pain tolerance? Kate hated to think that was the reason. Was she just trying to maintain her bravado? That seemed so unnecessary now after how much had changed.

“Is that like a nickname for one of your… guys?” Kate asked, opening a tube of antibiotic ointment.

She carefully spread it onto Alice’s knuckles. The swelling had gone down significantly since yesterday and Kate was confident that nothing was sprained or broken. Mary had shown her what to look and feel for to know the difference. 

“It was the wall. I hit the wall,” Alice elaborated as Kate put a bandage across the reddened flesh.

“What were you so upset about?”

“I was angry,” Alice revealed, bracing herself to explain. “Because I was wrong.”

Kate stopped in the middle of wrapping Alice’s hand.

“I found your map,” Alice revealed.

“My map?” Kate asked, confused.

“The one you kept in the red lunchbox,” she elaborated.

Kate finished wrapping, putting surgical tape on the end. It felt strange to be having this conversation with Alice still being very naked. It blurred the lines between Beth and Alice too much and Kate couldn’t name the feeling it caused.

“All this time, you never stopped looking for me,” Alice continued.

“I told you I didn’t,” Kate said, holding eye contact with Alice.

“I didn’t believe you. But the proof… I mean, everything I did was for nothing. I wanted to get revenge. And to hurt you for moving on without me. You and the Commander and Katherine and Mary were the bad guys and I was just an inconvenient reminder of the past. That map meant it wasn’t true. It meant that I was the bad guy,” she replied, ducking her head when the tears fell.

“It’s not that black and white. Not even close,” Kate replied.

She moved closer to Alice, lifting her face with both hands and wiping away the tears with her thumbs. 

“A lot of horrible things happened to you, Alice. You’ve done what you had to do to survive. Yeah, some of those things were really bad. But… I’m in no place to judge you. I just want to be here for you. And I get that it will probably take a long time before you feel like you can trust this. Before you can trust me. Especially after all the ways I betrayed you. But I promise you, things are different now,” Kate said, hoping she got through to Alice.

“I hope you mean that. Like, _really_ mean it. Because I couldn’t handle it if you betrayed me again, Kate,” she replied, terrified of that possibility.

“I risked everything last night. Because I love you. I know what the consequences are if people find out. This is easily worth all of it to me.”

“To me, too,” Alice agreed, leaning forward to kiss Kate.

“Okay. Good. Then we’re on the same page. Now come eat your bagel,” Kate replied, feeling the intense need to take away Alice’s sadness.

She wondered if it was possible. There was so much of it. If Alice was never going to Beth again, who would she become? Alice figured it really didn’t matter because right now she had exactly what she’d been fighting for all along. She didn’t feel so much like killing anymore when Kate looked at her with a baffling level of affection. It was hard for her to accept it because she felt like it didn’t make sense. No matter what Alice had ever done since the accident, it had always ended in misery. In disappointment. In a shattered heart. Beth built Alice from those scraps, configuring the pieces so that she could hide in fantasy, never having to experience the dark consequences of simply existing in real life.

What Kate was doing was essentially pulling out all of the jagged pieces that still hurt her. Making her see that real life didn’t always have to hurt and could, in fact, be absolutely beautiful at times. Times like this when she sat across from Kate, sipping her coffee. Starving, she ripped a piece off of her bagel, scooping up cream cheese from the tub before putting it in her mouth. Kate watched, noting that even the most minor details of Alice were chaotic. Undoubtedly, it was part of what made it impossible for Kate to ignore her romantic feelings for Alice. There wasn’t another person in the world like Alice and Kate would do whatever it took to make her happy. 

“Did you want me to get you something to wear?” Kate asked, getting a good look.

Alice was still completely naked, leaning forward on the wooden chair to take another bite.

“Sure, if you want the extra work of taking it off,” Alice replied, shrugging nonchalantly.

Kate nearly choked on the sip of coffee, unprepared for the suggestion that immediately drew vivid thoughts to mind. It was also such a stark contrast to the feelings that surrounded their morning up until that point. Alice got out of her chair, sitting on the table right next to Kate’s half-eaten bagel and crossing her legs. She looked down at Kate, who was trying to maintain eye contact, but faltered immediately to take in the naked body in front of her. Alice stayed quiet for a few seconds, enjoying the way it felt to have Kate look at her with such an impeccable mixture of want and affection.

“Let’s go back to bed, Kate,” Alice said, brushing her fingers through Kate’s hair.

Kate was on her feet impressively quickly after that, leaning forward toward Alice’s lips. Unlike last night, she could prepare for the kiss. She could watch as Alice’s eyes glanced quickly at her approaching lips before closing her eyes. Kate didn’t realize how much she’d love seeing the easy contentment on Alice’s face just before their lips met and her own eyes drifted shut. Alice uncrossed her legs, Kate quickly stepping between them as the kiss grew deeper. Last night was more tentative and exploratory than this. All of the thoughts and questions that created an ever-present distraction for Kate last time were gone now, leaving her free to be more in the moment. Gripping Alice’s backside, Kate lifted her from the table. Alice had to wrap her arms around Kate’s shoulders and her legs around Kate’s hips to hold on as she was carried into the bedroom.

Once Alice was seated on the bed, Kate put one knee down on the mattress between her legs. Kate brushed her thumb along Alice’s cheekbone and took a moment to read her expression. There was so much there, and despite how nonchalant Alice seemed about things a second ago, the seriousness was still very evident. Even though Kate meant what she said about her feelings, it was like Alice was still holding her breath, waiting for everything to come crashing down around her. Kate acknowledged it internally, reminding herself that there wasn’t going to be anything easy about this. The trauma wasn’t just going to disappear with breakfasts and kisses.

“You’re beautiful.”

Kate said it because it was true and because she wanted so badly to see Alice smile. Not the one she wore as a disguise to pretend the world couldn’t hurt her, but the one that lit up her eyes, too. She wanted Alice to really feel the words and how much she meant them. Alice smiled, but looked away. Part of her still resisted so heavily. If she gave herself completely to Kate, she would be giving her all of the power. Even though she had nagging doubts that Kate would run at the first complication, she also knew that Kate was the only one she’d ever be capable of trusting in such a way even if she wasn’t quite there yet. Alice had killed people. She’d been on the run. Before that, she was a hostage for years. Something about this felt scarier to Alice than all of that.

“Should we stop?” Kate asked when Alice seemed to retreat into her thoughts.

“Stop? Why?” Alice asked, confused.

She finally looked back up to Kate who was looking back at her with concern.

“Just… I thought this was what you wanted, but it seems like maybe you’re somewhere else right now,” Kate explained, sitting on the bed next to Alice.

While trying to organize her thoughts, Alice moved so that she was sitting with her back against the headboard. Kate turned sideways to face her, waiting patiently for her to say something. Inside, though, the silence was ripping her apart. 

“Remember we’d sneak out sometimes? To just lay in the grass and look at the stars? We talked about everything. Mostly the future. Then the accident happened and it got harder to think about the future. Everything I thought I could have just disappeared little by little. The very _last_ thing I had left to hope for was… this,” she explained, gesturing between them.

Kate felt sadness for Alice’s experiences. She felt anger at the man responsible, especially because his death did nothing to relieve Alice’s suffering. Mixed in with all of that, though, was this love she felt for her and that was what turned out to be the strongest out of everything.

“It’s the only thing I’ve wanted for a long time. So, I thought I’d be happy. And I am. But I just can’t stop being so afraid of having it all taken away. Like everything else,” she continued.

“You should give yourself a break, Alice. So many things have changed already. Just in one night. I mean, your whole life is going to be different. Again. It would be weird if you weren’t scared,” Kate said, hoping she was being comforting. 

“Your life, too,” Alice said, giving Kate a deeper insight into the fear.

“You’re right. We’re both starting a new life. Together. And we know we can’t stay here, so I think we’re just holding our breaths right now because there isn’t any solid ground under us yet. But you have me. I can be your solid ground for now. I’m gonna do whatever I can to protect you,” Kate replied.

“I hate it. Feeling so weak and so scared,” she said, shaking her head. 

Kate sighed, crawling up the bed to sit beside her. She turned to face Alice, waiting until Alice turned her head to make eye contact.

“Weak is the last thing you are,” Kate said so sincerely that Alice had to look away again. “Come here.”

Kate patted her lap and opened her arms, encouraging Alice to come closer. Eager to feel Kate’s comforting touch, Alice climbed into the space that had been made for her, sitting sideways and resting her head on Kate’s shoulder. Right away, Kate wrapped her arms tight around Alice. After her first deep breath, Alice’s anxieties started to slip away, no longer seeming important. She’d said it herself. She had exactly what she wanted. Maybe she could focus on just enjoying that. Even the emotional pain didn’t feel the way it used to because now she had someone that cared enough to help make it go away… not cause more.

“It’s a little ridiculous, isn’t it? Working so hard for my freedom just to trap myself,” Alice asked, not looking up from Kate’s shoulder.

“Tell me how I can help you.”

“Just be here,” Alice whispered back.

Kate hugged her tighter and they stayed that way for a few minutes. 

“Do you want to lie down? Go back to sleep?” Kate asked after a while.

Alice returned to the side of the bed she’d slept on last night, getting under the sheet. When Kate followed, she made sure her body pressed close to Alice’s, noticing that she seemed to be most comforted by touch. But, as soon as they were face to face again, Alice started reading Kate’s expression again.

“What are you looking for?” Kate asked, dying to have a hint of what was happening in her head.

“Just looking,” Alice said, admiring the flush on Kate’s cheeks a second later.

It was the greatest feeling of elation Alice had ever felt. The safety of Kate’s embrace allowed the chaos in her mind to be replaced with soothing, blue waves. Then, for several seconds, Alice just traced Kate’s lips with her gaze, appreciating them before tasting them. Kate held back, following Alice’s lead. It was hard to ignore the fact that Alice was still naked, making it hard for her to keep her hands from roaming beyond Alice’s waist. The first time she met Alice, she never would have imagined that she could be so vulnerable and soft. Kate was the only one she’d ever allow to see it, though, which made it all the more spectacular to witness.

Planting herself on the table next to Kate’s breakfast had been a playful and carefree act, performed with the intention of letting go and introducing some levity. That, however, wasn’t possible yet. Alice realized, quite quickly, that she was still very emotionally affected by the way Kate cared for her. So, when she found herself in bed, under Kate again, there was no sign of the earlier flippancy. Alice was desperate to feel more of Kate’s skin, the warmth helping her get more lost in their tiny world. She pulled Kate’s shirt up to her ribcage, at which point Kate took over, sitting back to take it off along with her bra.

Keeping the same slow pace of the night before, Kate kissed Alice. It went on a long time because there was no reason to rush and this was a big part of what made Alice feel safe. It was nearly as overwhelming as the first time, but for different reasons. Their hands roamed and gripped and caressed as their lips met over and over despite the gasping breaths between. Kate had never spent this much time just kissing, but she couldn’t, and didn’t want to, stop.

“Take off your pants,” Alice whispered against Kate’s cheek.

They were both already sweating and Kate felt the relief of the cool air as soon as she kicked her pants and underwear to the floor. Regardless of the heat, Kate’s heavy breathing was caused, in larger part, by the anticipation that rippled satisfyingly through her body. Alice’s legs opened enough for Kate to drop her hips down between them and Kate stiffened on top of her when their bodies were flush again. Since they’d spent so much time building up to this moment, Kate was extremely sensitive. She was letting her mind get completely absorbed in the delicious feeling of Alice’s flesh, warm and firm against hers.

“I love you so much,” Alice said, bringing Kate back to Earth.

“I love you, too, Alice.”

When Kate pushed her hips down into Alice, she knew she wouldn’t be able to last long enough like this. Taking long seconds in between, she only managed a few more thrusts of her hips before having to stop, her whole body shaking above Alice.

“Can I taste you?” Kate asked, bringing her hand up to push some of Alice’s hair out of her face.

“You really want to?” she asked, feeling shy at the request.

“I _really_ want to,” Kate replied, closing her eyes for emphasis.

Until Kate, Alice had always seen sex in a very utilitarian way. Sometimes she just needed to get off to keep herself from snapping under the pressures she was met with daily. It never meant anything other than that to her. The entirely new feelings of intimacy caught her entirely by surprise. She thought the desire she felt for Kate was as deep as the feeling went, but this was something so strong she couldn’t have ignored it if she tried. And she’d certainly never had anyone go down on her before. The idea appealed to her, especially when Kate still had a hopeful look on her face as she waited for permission. She delayed answering just another few seconds so that she could kiss Kate again.

“Do it,” Alice whispered when they broke apart.

Kate smiled, building the suspense with soft, randomly placed kisses. 

“You’re so beautiful,” she said, planting a kiss between Alice’s breasts.

She continued downward this time, making it clear to Alice that she was so close to getting what she wanted. Alice parted her legs partially, but Kate’s hands running up along her inner thighs guided them the rest of the way open. Kate had to swallow, already salivating at the sight of Alice’s most sensitive place. She licked her lips, further visually stimulated when Alice finally pushed through the last of her hesitation and spread her legs more fully, separating her dripping lips. Kate’s hot breath caused the sensitive nerves before her to twitch and she swallowed again, chancing a teasing lick. 

After just a hint of Alice’s taste, Kate had to work significantly harder to take her time when all she wanted to do was push her tongue deep inside of her. Alice’s back arched at that first touch, completely unprepared for how significant the sensation would be. She fell back to the bed, panting and only slightly better prepared for the next time Kate’s tongue pressed against her. Kate licked slowly up and down, fighting the urge to hold Alice’s hips down. It was such a possessive gesture and she wanted to be soft with Alice right now, letting her enjoy all the wonderful things about receiving oral gratification from someone who cares enough about her needs to please her selflessly. And while there was very little going on in Alice’s mind right now, she took a second to savor the fact that Kate was so dedicated giving her that pleasure.

“Baby, that feels so good,” Alice said, moaning deeply every few seconds.

Kate kept her own hips still against the bed because she didn’t want to falter for even a second. Not with Alice so close. She reached her hand up, teasing Alice’s breast. Alice put her hand over Kate’s, feeling the muscles in her hand as they contracted around it again. Knowing that Alice was going to come any second now, she decided to finally push the wet muscle inside of her, letting her feel the slight fullness and warmth. Upon doing so, Alice immediately thrust her hips up off of the bed, allowing Kate’s tongue to go just a fraction deeper. Kate was pretty sure that any neighbors in the vicinity could hear Alice as she groaned loudly, her knuckles white against the fistfuls of blue sheets.

Alice’s body started to tremble, but she didn’t want to put her hips back down yet. She was still enjoying the feeling of Kate’s tongue forcing its way back through her clamping muscles. There wasn’t anything she could compare the feeling to. Even when she’d touched herself… It wasn’t like this. She dropped heavily back to the bed after a few more moans, these ones sounding more spent and satisfied than desperate and needy. Alice’s hands were over eyes, slipping over tears and sweat as she dropped them to the pillow on either side of her head. 

“Are you okay?” Kate asked, immediately by her side.

“Yes,” Alice answered, simply, turning to cuddle against Kate.

Kate wrapped her in her arms for not the first time this morning and held her, feeling Alice’s slowing breath. Even though Kate had been right on the edge of orgasm for the last several minutes, she was calm now. 

“That was incredible,” Alice said, Kate feeling her breath against her chest.

“Want me to do it again?” Kate asked, rubbing Alice’s back.

Alice started kissing her, continuing for a couple of minutes, but not letting it build.

“Nobody’s ever made me feel like that before. Nobody’s ever _cared_ to make me feel like that before. I’m never going to forget that,” Alice said.

This time, when Alice kissed Kate again, she did allow it to build, needing to stay afloat on this exquisite mess of feelings.


End file.
